Sarah 270/365
My exes child support payment went up 80 dollars a month because of a Cost of Living increase. He barely has enough to get by on now. He is always welcome and invited to eat breakfast with us in the mornings when he comes to walk the girls to school, but often even before the increase that was his only meal a day. It is his responsibility to pay child support, but it is his right to be able to lead his life in a healthy and happy way. He has applied to get his payments lowered and they will not do it.
For now, we are giving him 40 dollars back every two weeks. When Robert gets another raise we will be giving him more.
He works hard at a job that pays minimum wage, he deserves better and I hope we can do better for him in the coming months.
8 comments:
Sarah, I love this post. My ex was ordered to pay much more than what he does but because I wanted to be fair I reduced it. Now that our daughter is almost 13 and we aren't that far off from not being in the friend of the court system I'm so glad that we didn't waste time and energy on fighting about money. I think it helps all of us get along better when there isn't conflict over $.
Sarah - I love the way you do what's right!
Both you and Robin are awesome parents!
I love this post and I will tell you why:
WE have had the OPPOSITE experience. When child support was adjusted to correspond to both parents' income (or income "potential" in her case), my stepson's mother than lied about her ability to work and child support was DOUBLED because she claimed to be disabled.
Do I believe my husband should support his son? Abso-freakin'-lutely. BUT, his mother has responsibility to support him also, and she shirked it in favor of stickin' it to him. I think that's crappy.
GOOD FOR YOU!!!!
This tugs at the heart. Bravo!
I *forgave* the last year of spousal support due to me, though my ex never had the courtesy to tell me he was going to stop sending a check. He got hit veryveryvery hard by the failing economy. The economy took the wind out of any retaliation I felt I needed - He lost just about everything - the economy got him harder than I ever could've. I'm so grateful I rarely think about him anymore. Gah.
Excellent post Sarah! Good for you and Robin...We're in Sarah's boat tho'. The ex psycho mom has a degree in astrophsysics....yet chooses to live like a hermit and is behind in the $160 month she owes us....ARRGH!!! They're STILL your children!!
This is really inspiring Sarah - I know when Em was born, we requested a reduction in the support Terrance was paying to the mother of his nearly adult son...Nope.
The child wasn't living with his Mom, but his grandmother. 800 dollars was being sent to a woman who had lied/denied Terrance was the father (Back in 1982) - then she came kicking down the door once the man she told was the father left her and demanded a DNA test to prove his parentage ( which showed the child was not his) The child was 7. The state of Michigan asked for 7 years of previous support PLUS 800 dollars a month going forward.
And when the child turned 18, she reverted on the agreement she had previously made and tried to get the payments extended.
It was sick. The whole system is sick.
And for people who just want to do what is right for their children ( which includes NOT gouging one parent so he can't eat) you have to slide around the rules.
Yet another reason for my to respect you.
You are an exceptional human being.
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